Just Call Me Charmin

So, for some reason, Scout has decided that I am her own personal roll of toilet paper. Lately, when she goes to the bathroom, if I'm around she will come right over to me afterward and wipe her bottom on me. She's decent about it and first comes up and gives the obligatory kiss (her version of a kiss is to come up, put her face close to mine and lick her own lips) and then she lays down and backs up to smoosh her butt into me thereby wiping her butt on me.

Smooshing her backside into me isn't new, she likes to lie like that sometimes. But lately, when she does it, all of a sudden I'll feel the spot on my clothing which is connected to her becoming warm and slightly damp and, I'll scoot her away and sure enough, I'm toilet paper.

Now, to be honest, I'd rather she do that to my clothing than like, the couch, because I can wash my clothes but, ew! I think the new dampness is a result of a guard I put up to keep her from peeing over the side of the box. When she pees she insists on getting into the litter box and peeing with her butt just barely inside it (thankfully she poops with her butt facing the opposite way so it's always in the box) so half the time it lands outside the box on a tray that is there for that purpose. The tray generally works well but I have to clean it constantly.

Recently the litter box people invented a guard you can put up that keeps this very thing from happening so, I eagerly bought it and put it up. It works well and does solve the problem but I think it splashes the pee back on her backside.

So, now I have to choose the lesser of the evils -- take off the guard so her backside doesn't get splashed, train her to not pee so close to the opening (I've been trying this for years and she catches on for a bit but if I stop being vigilant, she lapses back into her piggish behavior), or resign myself to being toilet paper.